do you remember the sound of the waves on the shore?
by The Crownless Queen
Summary: In which Lily survives the war, visits the girl she loved in St Mungo's, and regrets. For WolfWinks.


Written for Hogwarts' Ship Battles - AliceLily, "This is a surprise.", the Writing Club - Showtime: The World Was Wide Enough: (emotion) Regret and Themed List - Astronomy Tower and the Roald Dahl Day Event - Bananaberry scoopajelly - Write a pairing you've never written before.

If you're wondering - the only difference with canon is that Lily somehow survived too. The Longbottoms were still attacked by the Lestranges and driven mad.

 _Word count:_ 1117

* * *

 **do you remember the sound of the waves on the shore?**

The atmosphere in the hospital room is oppressive. The walls and ceiling are white, and there is light, but somehow when Lily enters the room, all she can think of is that it looks like death—like this is a place where bodies are being kept, when they're not quite dead.

Which, Lily realizes with a heavy heart, isn't that far off from the truth.

She steps forward silently, ignoring the man on the first bed and heading for the woman. Like this, with blonde hair carefully brushed back and her eyes closed—eyes she used to stare into, in what feels like another life—Lily can almost believe that this is simply another one of those times where she fell asleep somewhere she shouldn't.

But she can't. This place won't let her forget—not with that weird smell of potions in the air, this smell of hospitals she had once thought belonged solely in the Muggle world.

"Oh, Alice," she sighs, voice trembling. Her fingertips hover just inches above the pale skin of Alice's hand, resting atop white sheets, but she doesn't dare touch. Doesn't dare disturb this peaceful image.

"What have they done to you?"

The silence doesn't answer her, and with a sob she can't quite stop, Lily lets herself remember.

* * *

"Well, this is a surprise."

Lily huffs a laugh as she tilts her head back to look at the newcomer. She doesn't need to—she already knows it will be Alice.

It is always Alice.

"Is it really?" she asks, gesturing at the blond girl to sit beside her.

"I guess not," Alice hums softly after a moment of silence. She sits next to Lily, feet dangling over the edge of the Astronomy tower, and the line of her body against hers lights a fire in Lily's veins. "So, why are you here this time?"

Lily shrugs, tearing her eyes away from Alice to look at the night sky.

"It's peaceful up here. And the stars… Sometimes I feel like they're speaking to me." She looks back at Alice, shifting a little closer. "Do you think they listen to us?"

"The stars?" Alice asks, and Lily is glad that she cannot detect a hint of disdain or doubt in her voice—only curiosity.

"Yeah." Lily huffs out a laugh. "I mean, not like _we_ listen, but like, I don't know… they can just hear us?" She shrugs. "Do you think that's possible?"

Alice stays silent for a while, but while she doesn't speak, she reaches out for Lily's hand and links their pinkies together. Finally, she says, "There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio-"

"Than are dreamt of in your philosophy," Lily finishes the quote, grinning widely. "Oh, you've read it! Well, tell me," she urges, when Alice only smiles, "what did you think about it?!"

"It was… Interesting," Alice replies, grimacing slightly. "Definitely different from any wizarding literature I've read. It was… I don't know… A bit hard to follow at times, I guess?"

"Well, it _is_ a play," Lily muses. "An old one at that, too, and plays are meant to, well, _be played_. Oh, but if you saw it on stage… I know you'd love it." She sighs, remembering when she had—she had been young then, barely aware of her magic, and she had spent months trying to convince her parents to let her join a theater troupe, nevermind that she was too young for that.

Alice rests her head on Lily's shoulder, the weight of it oddly comforting, and Lily's heart flips in her chest. "Maybe we could go, one day, then."

Lily holds her breath for a moment, before exhaling slowly. "You'd want to?"

Alice twists her head until Lily's staring in her brown eyes. She could get lost in those eyes, she thinks—could get lost in those feelings, too, because Alice's hair is tickling underneath her chin and her breath is so very warm against Lily's skin, and she never wants this moment to end.

"Of course I'd want to," she replies, voice as soft as a feather. She shifts a little, moving away from Lily so she can face her, and every atom of Lily's body is screaming at her to _stay, please, don't leave me_.

"Listen," Alice continues, taking Lily's hand in hers, caressing the skin tenderly. "I know we don't speak about _this_ , about us, but… I like you, and I know you like me, too. I kind of want to see where this can go. If you do."

Want surges through Lily's veins, and she's helpless to stop it. "I do," she whispers fervently, words oddly choked in her mouth, leaning into Alice's embrace until there's barely an inch of place between them. If she could, she'd bring them closer still. "Merlin, Alice, I do want that. I want everything with you."

"Well," Alice huffs out with a laugh as bright as sunshine, "I can't promise you _everything_ , but we can certainly start with that play you wanted me to see."

"That sounds perfect," Lily breathes, stomach fluttering.

"Perfect," Alice echoes, grinning. "Then it's a date." She leans in, her breath warm against Lily's lips. From this close, Lily can see every little detail of her skin, every speck of color hidden in her eyes, and as breathtaking as those things are, they pale in comparison to the soft press of Lily's lips against hers.

 _Finally!_ her blood sings as her eyes flutter shut, and Lily smiles into the kiss, winding her hands around Alice's waist and neck, playing with the short hair there.

Later, they'll hear noise—footsteps on the staircase echoing off the walls, the muted mutter of a grumpy, out of breath voice—and see the light of a lantern dancing in the shadows, and they'll have to run and hide, giggling into the night.

But for now, they are alone, with only the stars to watch over them and keep their secret.

* * *

"We never got to see that play," Lily mumbles, laughing tearfully. She wipes her cheeks ruefully. "It's stupid, but I keep thinking about that—how we never even had the chance to do that. You'd have liked it." Her voice softens, and she reaches for a trembling hand to caress Alice's hair. "I know you'd have liked it."

She sighs, and it sounds so final in this cold, lifeless room. "I miss you," she confesses. Her sadness wears her down, and Lily feels old. "I wish we had gotten more time."

It's wishful thinking, she knows that, but as she leaves, she could swear the air carries words, spoken by a voice she knows as well as her own.

' _I wish so, too.'_


End file.
